writer, ministry--the work has begun

I am a writer.  I am.  I don't know why it takes someone else affirming it for me to really believe it.
I saw an editor today.  He was so positive, so affirming, that I knew beyond any doubt that my dream was going to come true.  My head is still spinning.  It is amazing to me--totally amazing.  He and I are going to work together to make my dream become a reality.
He told me that I need a platform.  He told me that I should have a ministry--something that I can do that will promote my book while serving God.  I just looked back to Facebook--Sept 15--my fondest dream is being told "You should make a living at this. The way you write and the way you read, you're perfect!! Of course, little chance of that happening.  

That was what I wrote on the 15th.  And it came true today.  The time is right--my kids are all grown, I am on my own, I have no major debt, and so I can look at the possibility of change.  It's a big leap (and I'm not saying that I will give up my day job yet), but it's happening.

He said (Adam--he has a name) that I should start asking God what I should do.  I have been, and he's been reminding me of three things;  healing, forgiveness, and obedience.  All of this has come about because of all of those things.  

I have been in a process of healing since 1993.  My husband died and I was broken.  Broken--more like shattered.  Crumbled into a million pieces.  Shards of glass lying on the floor with no hope of redemption.  One by one, God has picked each piece up and gently, carefully, lovingly put it back into place.  No, I'm not who I was.  I am cracked, patched, mended.  But I'm so beautiful. Each scar, each mark is a reminder of the work that God has done.

Forgiveness--how very important that is.  In my life, thank God, forgiveness has rarely been hard for me.  Sometimes, yes, I did find it hard to forgive.  It was hard to forgive our doctor for forcing her religion on us when all we wanted was to keep our baby alive.  It was hard to forgive when I knew that the people who hurt me so terribly would never come to me and ask for forgiveness.  But I've always known how important forgiveness is.  I've seen firsthand the bitterness and hatred that comes when forgiveness is refused.  I don't want that ever to happen to me.  And so I know that forgiveness is for yourself every bit as much as for the offender.

Obedience.  This is the secret to successful living, first and foremost.  Don't try to talk him out of it.  Just do it in obedience.  If you prove that you can be obedient in the small things, then he will entrust you with bigger things.  It's by obedience that we learn to walk into abundant life in Him.

This is it, Lord.  Now just show me how to use this platform for your glory.  And if it's supposed to change, please help me understand how.