Probing old wounds

It's been twenty years, and I don't think about it much, but every once in a while….

I see your face, vibrant and alive, your smile that lit up the room
and then I see you, lifeless yet still warm, a new corpse in your hospital bed.

I dream of you and I together at the beach
Arm in arm, walking down the sand,
And then the dream turns to nightmare as you fall to the sand and don't get up.

My love has died
and I have not seen fit to find a new love
and yet I yearn for arms around me
for a future that I can walk towards.

I have to let you go,
and yet I yearn to keep you close.
You are my heart, my life,
but I know, none better,
that life goes on.
So why can't I?

I will start again.
I will learn to live without you.
I will pick up the pieces and move on.
I will set down our dreams
And find new ones of my own
And I will once again open my heart to love.

Maybe tomorrow.